My very honest financial statement

I told my mom I want to make a personal loan with her. Usually, in term of buying gadgets, personal furnitures, clothings, we(my sister and I) will definitely refer to our mom, I don’t know why but ever since we’re small, all this kind of things will be handled by mom so we barely ask for abah’s interference. Abah will handle things like maintenance of our cars, road tax, license, summons, etc. That’d be under abah’s surveillance.

Mom laughed indefinitely when I told her about my intention. Of course I have no idea why did she laughed.  I might have few predictions but few times juga I asked her why did she laughed synically and end it with silence. It could be because I never have asked before. Or it could be funny in a way you’re doing loans with your own mother, mom should just give the money. Or uhmm, Idk.

I know it sounds unnecessary for you to borrow money from your own mother especially in buying things that you really need. In my case, I need to buy a new powerful laptop. Because I am still under my parents’ responsibility, so logically, I deserve to ask anything without having to ‘borrow’ right?

In some circumstances, I believe that there are few parents who are trying to teach their children to feel the hardships of having to buy their own necessities using their own money. I think, it is also applicable for the money our parents give monthly. Although it is our parents’ initially, but they give it to us, so basically we’re the manager of the money now. There comes the hardships whether we’re going to spend it wisely or not, it’s all under our sense and responsibility.

Likewise, I know we all are expecting a very luxurious life at this young age. Okay maybe I should not say ‘very luxurious’. Luxurious is enough by right, our parents supply us with enough amount of money for us to go shopping every weekends, trying every pair of shoes in H&M or maybe enough for us to go travel every month, have our own up-to-date gadgets, trying lipsticks in Sephora and buying them, going to a hipster café, eating fancy food, having a lot of shoes and tops and pants collection, I know, we all feel the same, especially girls.

But not all of us are given the same chance right. Not all of us are born in a rich family. Just bear to the fact that we’re too delusional with a fabulous life that actually just befitting our own nafs. ohmeyy going conservative lalala. But true enough la for me to ask myself to always feel sufficient with whatever I have. Sometimes I know my mom always have a sufficient amount of money to fulfill my needs. But it’s just that I learn from my siblings that we’re not pampered by materials too much and don’t ask for unnecessary things, if we have our own money, use our own. There comes the need that we have to save money so that we don’t have to always ask money from our parents.

My first android phone is a Samsung galaxy  Y that costs around 500 if I’m not mistaken on that time, my brother bought me but I need to give RM 100 and he’ll add another 400. He said, if there isn’t any chunk of my money, I will be less appreciate it because the phone will be just like a gift from my brother. I used that phone quite lama when people has already use iphone 5 kut. I aimed iPhone 5s after that because I was quite amazed with the rumor that it gives a good quality of pictures using both front and back camera. I bought it at its original price after a very patient and long wait using cheap android phone, I know it’s gonna worth Alhamdulillah it has been 2 years and my phone is still fine and she’s my baby.

As I’m fond of photography, I know it’s not enough to only have a phone camera. Of course, siapa tak bangga pegang dslr ambik gambar sana sini. (that was what I think masa tu). I bought my own dslr using my own money fully paid by me. As times getting older, I am more passionate of discovering lenses, I am willing to work for a month as a babysitter just to get a prime lens (50 mm f/1.8 canon lens) at RM 510. And few months later, I collected money just to buy another new powerful lens costs RM 1k+. I’ve been fully satisfied with the equipment that I have, Alhamdulillah I helped a lot of people in their process of producing videos, in term of lending my lenses, teaching them how to use the dslr, giving advice on how they could improve something, teaching them how to do editing etc. After all, I don’t want to say, it’s a waste of my sweat that I only work, just to get a lens. It’s certainly worthwile.

Sometimes I claim to my mother that I never asked for her money in upgrading my equipment, if I’m about to ask her permission to buy me a new shoes or whatever, but later I realise that I chose this path and she never say yes or no about it so I have to remain silent and don’t deserve to speak that way. Now that I have to buy a new laptop so that I can pass this laptop I currently use to my sister because it’s actually hers, I think my mom is being considerate by agreeing to give me the loan only after she settled some things.

I can’t be grateful enough to have been thaught to feel and experience how hard it is to get money and spend it after that, and to not being pampered by my parents’ wealth. Because I believe this is actually my first step on a series of a long staircase in managing my own finance. This awareness is really a need for me so that I am not shocked if something might happen the way I don’t want it happen, you know what I mean.

Toodles!